ShopDreamUp AI ArtDreamUp
Deviation Actions
Literature Text
At times, I wonder if it will all be worth it. The stress, tension, sleepless nights, the continuous worry and anxiety seem to be the only things that both my mind and body had been forced to withstand for the last couple of years. Yet, I see no horizon, no silver lining, nor a twinkle of that desperate hope. I am living in this realm of ongoing torment. It has been sharpening its claws against the fortress of walls protecting my mind and the day is near, I can sense the energy within my core changing, the walls breaking. Soon, I will be succumbed to the one thing I swore to never let wrap its clutches around me.
It was that very same fear, that idea that constantly crept within my preciously fortified mind. Doubt, fear, they were the driving forces within me.
What if I couldn’t handle all of this? I had a passion, my friends and family knew that this love of mine was my world, but this passion was not sturdy, it held too many unknowns. As easily as it could bring me happiness, it could also cause me to crash, to veer off the future road I had planned to take. What if that road was blocked? After all those hours, days, years of perfecting and enjoying my passion? It had no promise for future triumph, but I yearned with all my heart to live out my life, engrossed into this aching love that I had for this passion.
I wished so desperately to give up on working towards a goal, a secondary passion that I had far less love for. Yet, this smaller infatuation had a future, it would eventually work out, I could see that road clearly, but even though it wasn’t hidden in fog, it didn’t become palatable.
Fear, depression, stress and regret constantly circulated within my soul. I wanted to reach out and walk towards that unknown, to truly be myself, to be happy even if my passions ultimate destination was unknown. Yet, to my parents, I would never be a perfect daughter, if I was to leave the stress behind and do what I loved.
I just wanted to truly be myself.
“Leah!”
I slowly raised my eyes up from my notebook, from the perfect world only my mind could make up.
My friend leaned over, seeing my random pairing of stories and sentences engorging themselves across my chemistry homework.
She arched her eyebrows, “You really need to give that up.”
She had said it so easily, as if what she was referring to was as simple as swatting an insect out of the way. However, that insect was my passion, and it stuck to me as perfectly and functionally as my beating heart.
Exclusives Tier
♥ Support me by subscribing to this tier, and get access to my WIPs .
Your support means a lot to me ♥
$3/month
Suggested Collections
[...]
Rights belong to only me.///
Comments6
Join the community to add your comment. Already a deviant? Log In
Ahh I can relate to this, especially the ending. You've described it so well, both what the narrator feels and what other people, like the friend, seem to feel about the narrator's passion.
It's frustrating sometimes, when you have something you really love to do but everyone around you all dismisses it as "silly" or "a waste of time." I feel like you've captured that feeling perfectly here.
Keep up the great work, and I hope you find a place for your own passion in your life ♥
It's frustrating sometimes, when you have something you really love to do but everyone around you all dismisses it as "silly" or "a waste of time." I feel like you've captured that feeling perfectly here.
Keep up the great work, and I hope you find a place for your own passion in your life ♥